"I am angry."
"I feel angry."
What's your internal experience when you read each of these statements? Does number one feel heavier or more intense? Do you feel less attached to the emotion in the second one? I know that's true for me.
Why do we use the words "I am" to describe how we feel? When we do this, we're essentially claiming the emotion as part of who we are.
No wonder we try to push painful or uncomfortable emotions away! If we believe subconsciously that we'll be stuck with them, it only makes sense that we'd try to avoid feeling them at all costs.
But when we change the language, it reflects the reality: an emotion is a physiological experience that we have...and then it's over.
Emotions are "energy in motion", and they are fluid and ever-changing, like a river.
That's great news. We have emotions. We are not our emotions.
Knowing this, we can allow ourselves to experience them fully, and trust that they'll pass.
Just as who we are today is not the same person we were yesterday, our emotional state is always changing too, in response to our thoughts and external circumstances. One minute we can feel full of joy, and then a piece of news can send us into despair. We'll feel deep sadness for the state of the world and then notice we feel immense gratitude for our own situation. Every emotion we feel is valid and true in that moment, and then it passes.
We can't step in the same river twice.
We can take comfort in this fact. The dark, cold swirling waters we're in will soon be swept away with the current to make way for warmer, calm waters. Then the winds will pick up and bring waves...which we can trust will pass soon too.
All that's required of us is to keep swimming downstream, going along for the ride.
How does one do this exactly?
Notice what we're feeling in the moment, or call up the feeling later when it feels safe to do so.
Allow ourselves to fully experience what's there - whether it's pleasant and unpleasant - without judgment or resistance.
Notice when things naturally shift and a new energy/feeling emerges.
What emotions have you experienced in the last 24 hours? Simply naming each one is validating and powerful.
Are there any emotions that feel like they haven't been fully expressed - any emotional hangovers? I invite you to make space to feel them completely and trust that they will pass when they're fully expressed.
